I wish we’d gotten a prenup and I hate that I feel this way We’ve been married for almost 6 years. No major problems not heading for divorce or anything like that. But I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately and it’s kind of eating at me. When we got engaged my dad asked if we were doing a prenup. I said no, my fiance at the time said it felt unromantic and like we were planning to fail. I agreed because I didn’t want to start our marriage assuming it would end.
That felt wrong but now I have this job I really love and I’ve been putting money into retirement and savings and there’s this voice in my head that won’t shut up. We don’t have kids yet but we talk about it. I make more than my husband, not by a huge amount but enough that it matters and I just keep thinking about how if something did happen down the line, everything gets split and I don’t even know what that looks like. I brought it up once a few months ago, like could we do a postnup now and he got really defensive. Said I was planning our divorce and that it was insulting.
We dropped it but I can’t stop thinking about it. I don’t think we’re going to get divorced. I love him but I also didn’t think my aunt would get divorced after 15 years and she did and it was a mess.
My coworker just went through one and said the legal fees alone were insane. I feel like an asshole for even thinking this way. Like I’m not fully committed or I’m waiting for it to fail.
But isn’t it just smart to protect yourself? I don’t know. I just wish we’d done it before when it would’ve been easier.
