I met Gregor later in life, well into my forties, when I had almost given up on finding a partner. I wasn’t actively seeking a relationship, but we connected instantly, and it felt effortless. He was charming, witty, and seemed genuinely interested in me. We shared similar values and dreams, and within a year, we were married. Our first year felt like an extended honeymoon. We traveled, laughed, and built a life together that felt idyllic and full of promise. Then, disaster struck. The company I worked for, a small tech startup, declared bankruptcy seemingly overnight. I was devastated. Not only did I lose my income, but I also lost my sense of purpose and security. Telling Gregor was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I expected support and understanding, but his reaction was far from what I anticipated. He was visibly annoyed, his face tightening as I explained the situation. “What, so now I’m the sole breadwinner?” he snapped, his voice laced with dissatisfaction.
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I was shocked and hurt by his response. His lack of empathy stung, but I knew I needed to pull myself together and find a solution. Determined to contribute, I immediately started searching for a new job. I swallowed my pride and took a cleaning position at a local business. It wasn’t glamorous, but it was honest work and helped us stay afloat. I worked tirelessly, balancing long hours with household chores, all while Gregor continued to work in his well-paid job and show increasing disdain towards mine.
Fast forward to Gregor’s 45th birthday. He decided to throw a lavish party at an expensive restaurant, inviting all his friends, family, and colleagues. I helped plan the event, eager to show my support and make him feel celebrated. During the party, his sister raised her glass for a toast. She spoke about how lucky Gregor was to have me, how I had always been there for him, and how I made his life better. Her words warmed my heart, and for a moment, I felt a flicker of hope that maybe Gregor appreciated me more than he let on.
Then Gregor stood up to give his own speech. He started by thanking everyone for coming and showering him with love. He smiled, a glint in his eyes that I couldn’t quite decipher. Then, he turned to me, his expression hardening slightly. “Oh, I know I’m lucky,” he began, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “But let’s be honest, she’s basically my dependent now. I mean, [“I’D HAVE KICKED HER OUT IF SHE WASN’T SO OBEDIENT”]. It’s just a pity I invested all that money in her”.
The room fell silent. I felt my face flush crimson with embarrassment and disbelief. He was laughing, as if he had just delivered the wittiest joke of the night. But it was not a joke. His words were calculated, cruel, and intended to humiliate me in front of everyone we knew. My heart shattered into a million pieces. The man I thought I knew, the man I had vowed to spend my life with, had revealed his true colors. He saw me as an investment, a possession, someone to be controlled and discarded when I no longer served his purpose.
The next three minutes were a blur of shock, anger, and betrayal. I felt like I was watching everything unfold from outside my body. I don’t remember exactly what I did or said, but I do remember the intense feeling of clarity that washed over me. In that moment, I knew that I could no longer stay in this relationship. I would no longer tolerate being treated with such disrespect and contempt. I gathered my composure, stood tall, and made a decision that would change the course of my life forever.
